I find that as I grow wiser, I tend to keep a lot more things to myself than I have ever done before. I wonder whether that can be quite normal for women of my age. You just feel like there is just so much going on in your life at the same time, and there simply is no time to waste on relaying to someone else no matter how close, on what had already happened.
Reflecting again about my life, I do wish that I have adopted focus as my important trade. On the outlook, others may look at me as a very focused and disciplined person. On the inside, I wished I was more so.
To date, I have yet to resolve my decision on my career, and what I really want to do. Working is I must say, rather dreadful!!! You are constantly at the back and call of someone all the time. If it is not your Boss, it is your dreadful client!!
The Boss tends to think that when they pay you every month, they control your life too? What kind of stupid life is that? All Bosses are the same. Then again, what options do we have. Even Ten~Ten is a slave in his career at the moment. I supposed I'm not helping when I myself give him a hard time!! What a meanie I am.... Must change...
The terrible thing is I do realise that I have and still is procrastinating a lot, thus the non-decision about my life. I dont really want to make a superficial decision, thus the wrong one. What happens, go with the flow, just as I have been doing for the past 3 months or so.... How different am I then, from all those stupid and inexperienced project managers that I so often talked and criticized about?....
I wish that I could talk about more intelligent things like politics, global economy, financial crisis etc, etc,etc, rather than about me, myself and I...... Huh...Now my anger is let out!!...
Ciao...