Today is Mother's Day.... I try to be the best daughter that I have ever been in the last 39 years of my life... I must say that is takes a tremendous effort to do so... Well, obviously I have never ever been the very best daughter for Mama, but it really is most difficult now, that Mama is extremely sensitive at this stage of her life......
I often experience the side effects of her hurt and/or dissatisfaction that she feels towards my siblings...... that which she can't let out directly to the 'source' of the unhappiness...... Knowing exactly how she feels, it is not always easy to communicate the same...... (in a diplomatic manner).... to my siblings... as they too are hyper-sensitive about...God knows...EVERYTHING in life.... How about me???... (Shhhhhh... put ME aside)
Well, I do know what is REALLY important to Mama (most times), ....her one and only son (the blue-eyed boy of her life) is the most precious to her... ..yet he seemingly couldn't care less..... or should I say much???
Well, Mama admittingly is not an easy person to get along with, and his wife obviously couldn't get along with her, after living under one roof for awhile. Of course, mother-in-laws can never live with their daughter-in-laws.... The sad thing is that this has gone on for so long, since Babah passed on, about 7 years now.... My sister-in-law had tried to make ammends many times, but to no avail... I have a stubborn & proud Mama actually, the truth be said.....
What triggered it all? I suspect .... the Malay movie that she watched last night with all of us,... about a son who 'Derhaka' towards his mother.... Why do I say that? Half way through the movie, Mama asked me.... "Is your brother back from Melaka?"...
He had previously called her apologizing that he couldn't come for her 73rd birthday celebration as he was in Melaka the whole week.....
"I suppose so..." I replied, knowing very well that he was....
She kept quiet, but I knew what she was thinking.... He has not visited her for sometime... and now she was going back to Penang.....
I wish I could make him see, that he just needs to show that he cares a bit more... and it would already have been enough....
Me on the other hand... could try my very best to impress her, care for her....till the cows go home.... It is still not the same as it was coming from her beloved SON...
Well, I think nothing of it... As I had 39 years to get used to it....
I just wish that I can do more to pull my family together.......
My second brother... Hmmm that is a whole different story........
1 comment:
You know, when people write from "the heart", it will leave an impact. Doesn't matter that the post is seven months ago, and that you didn't know me... After reading this, I know what I have to do IMMEDIATELY (or, in the morning) - something concerning my own elderly mother. Thanks.
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